The demise of two of my latter online "things" (can't really call them relationships) have led me to feeling somewhat low. So low, in fact, that I don't have the effort to be sarcastic or flippant. I will not go in chronological order because I, wanting to be an optimist, like to end things positively.
1) The not so nice end (Online Guy #3)
He said "Call me." I called him. He didn't return my call that night nor did he return my call the next day. My friends said things to me like, "Oh, he's at a conference, or maybe he's really busy with work, or maybe he's traveling on business in a country that has no cell service or telephones or internet service." My friends, my dear sweet friends. Aren't they so cute? My guy friend told me "If he was interested, he would have called you back within 24 hours. He hasn't." Then he badgered me to log onto my online dating account so he could check out guys #3 and #4. #4's profile was down (for reasons explained below) while #3's account stated he logged on earlier that day. "Hmm," the rational part of my brain thought, "if he was in fact so busy or working in a country without any mode of communication, then how was he able to find the time or means to log onto the dating website?" The answer is pretty obvious. He's moving on.
2) The nice end (Online Guy #4)
He said "We should definitely do this again." I then wrote my post below about how I wasn't feeling any special zing for him. He called me and we were chatting on the phone. Then he said, "I have something to tell you." He then informed me how he wanted to let me know he was going to try to patch things up with his ex-girlfriend. Wow. I gave him props on the phone for being so upfront and honest -- most guys would drop off the face of the planet or fly one-way to the Island of Lost Men, but #4 was so kind as to let me know what was up. I thanked him for his honesty and noted how refreshing it was for a guy to be so forthright. And he reiterated that he did have a great time and that we should keep in touch. I agreed. And the truth was, I did.
So those are "The Ends" of the 2 guys. All in one day. There really is no easy way to sugarcoat the fact that a guy just doesn't like you. It's probably easier to be angry than sad. But I suspect it's healthier to be sad, sad without the rationalizing and guy-bashing, sad without the sarcasm, just plain calm sad.
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3 comments:
Screw 'em, girl, screw 'em. You don't need that shit. Online dating sucks. The next girl is only a click away and we've both discovered that. We're honestly too good for online dating.
Try not to be down...So it didn't work out with guy #3. It happens. Pick yourself up, dust yourself off and move on. You're obviously too smart for that bum.
I know that this is really cliche--but there are other men out there who will fall in love with you. At least you are out there--tyring. Me? I keep myself busy so I don't have to deal with a demise.
This may or may not make you feel better, but here's my online dating experience.
Guy #1: He was making fun of people who live off the grid, which should have been my first warning sign, because I'm way into the outdoors. Then he told me about a camping story which involved him getting upset because it was dark and he wanted to read comic books. Well, the sun usually does set at night. Then he made fun of women with armpit hair (which I had copious quantities of at the time). He also looked at me funny when I tried to identify a plant I saw. I also tried to pay for my own drink because I think it's rude to assume the guy will pay for you, and he got all offended, saying something like, "I think I can cover it." I guess I insulted his masculinity or something. I then proceeded to further insult his masculinity by asking if I could walk him to his car, which I suppose was a nice way to say, "I want to go now." He said, "Yes, I need you to walk me to my car, because I'm so dainty." Whatever.
Then there was dude #2, who sent me an e-mail, and then sent subsequent e-mails every day for about a week before we met for coffee at Starbucks. He gave me a hug before we met, paid for my chai (or chai-latte, or whatever they call it there) and then we spent about an hour talking. Then, in an odd moment of silence in our conversation, he suddenly said, "I'm going to let you go now," gave me a quick hug, and ran out the door. O---kay. He was very materialistic and judgemental and spent the majority of the date talking about his new car, and I think I blew it when I told him how old mine was. I guess he is cooler than me because he has a new car, even though he can't afford the payments and had to move back in with his mom. I suppose I shouldn't be judgemental, but he started it.
Guy #3 seems more normal, so far, but he told me his worst online date experience. He is a scientist and went on a date with an adamant creationist. He told her he was Jewish but believe in evolution and she didn't get it, and kept repeating, "But you're Jewish" when he tried to explain. She also insisted on discussing abortion with him and telling him it was murder. But the last straw was when he was telling her his family history, how his grandparents were Holocaust survivors, and she said (I kid you not!!) "My grandfather was a famous Nazi." A what? "You know that movie, Schindler's List? He was mentioned in that movie." He asked her if she was proud of the fact and she said, "No, but I'm not embarrassed about it either." I think she should be...
*Sigh*
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