Age is just a number

I know I said I wouldn't talk about Online Guy #3 anymore. And really I'm not. This post isn't about Online Guy #3. It's about guys who lie online and eventually get caught.

What sparked the sequence of events that led to this pathetic post? My friend visited this weekend, and the subject of online dating came up. Of course, I discussed #3 and mentioned how the self-described 37-year-old looked a bit older in person than in his photo (a more aged face, a bit more gray). He was still handsome, so I went with it (obviously). Then blah blah blah he doesn't return my call after our second date.

My friend smirked and said, "Hey, maybe he's one of those guys in their early forties who say they're in their late thirties to get younger chicks."

"What?!" I said.

"Yeah, the sound of 'forty' is more of a turn-off than the sound of 'thirty.' "

"Come on, have you actually heard of guys in their forties lying online and saying they were in their thirties??"

He looked at me like I just asked him whether or not George W.'s IQ was a two-digit number. "Yeah."

This bugged me. So in my neurosis, I logged onto my online dating account for the first time in a long time, and saw -- lo and behold -- #3 was no longer 37. His age miraculously changed to 39. My jaw dropped. WHAT - THE - F?!

First, #3 and I separately indicated we were looking for long-term relationships. How can you lie about your age if you plan on being with someone long-term? Like somewhere down the line, when you're at the altar, you'll say "Hey honey, I'm not actually 30, I'm actually 50?" How did he think he was going to get away with that? (And yes, he did for a while, I know.)

Second, I remember telling him a story about how my friend was semi-deceived online by a guy, and how when he got caught, the deception was clearly a turnoff. Translation: lying online is bad and wrong. And he asked me for a second date after that.

I told two guy friends on two separate occasions about this and both of their reactions were identical: "Okay, and you are surprised because...?" It wasn't a shocker to them that a guy would lie about his age online. Okay I know that doesn't sound that surprising, but (1) I thought that only happened on sitcoms for comedic effect, and (2) I never thought it would happen to me.

So women and men, beware. And still I wonder, what the F is #3's real age?