More than a color

As I've mentioned in previous entries, I'd rather be treated as if I were white (i.e., like a normal person) rather than an "Oriental" (i.e. like a minority).

A couple other yellow gals and I went to a couple bars last night when a couple of much-older white dudes started chatting with us. I prefer that a guy just chat me up like a normal person, asking the usual lame but effective questions like "So what do you do for fun?" and "Did you grow up in the city?" I feel at ease and comfortable. When a guy starts venturing into race, I put my guard up a little. I start thinking, Great, what's this guy going to ask now? Whether I know kung fu? Whether I've watched all of Lucy Liu's movies? When was the last time I've been to my mother land? Yes, I'm paranoid. But unfortunately, I have been asked those questions. Seriously.

So one guy -- thinking he's oh-so-PC -- asked me "What nationality are you?" I looked at him with pity. He just asked the wrong girl the wrong question. My yellow pals, being much more normal and nice, simply told them their ethnicities. But I wasn't feeling particularly charitable. So I replied, "I am American."

As I expected, he asked, "No I mean your nationality."

I replied, "I am a citizen of the United States of America. My nationality is American."

He shook his head and said, "No I mean NATIONALITY. Like I am German Irish."

This was getting boring so I refrained from saying "Ah, you have dual citizenship in Germany and Ireland?" and instead said, "Ah, you mean to ask my ethnic background?" He disregarded the question and repeated (for what felt like the nine hundredth time) "I mean your nationality."

I smiled. "I am American, but my ethnic background is Yellow." Then they started asking all these questions about the Yellow Country, Yellow culture, and the Yellow language ("Ooh, how do you say 'Hello' in Yellow?"). I couldn't help but wonder whether they really gave a rat's ass about All That Is Yellow. Granted, maybe I was being way too hard on the guys. Maybe they were genuinely, honestly curious about All That Is Yellow and it wasn't until they bumped into three yellow gals did they remember their burning curiosity about Yellowness.

However, I suspect that, like so many other people, they mistakenly believed that if they dwell on someone's minority status, they are being more respectful of her status by being painfully aware of it. They have to acknowledge it, discuss it, philosophize on it, and praise the accomplishments of all people of that demographic. For example, a guy once told me that once a girl realized he was Jewish, she exclaimed "Oh, you're Jewish? Henry Kissinger was a great man!"

No doubt, there are minorities who would eat that up. I don't. This is not to say I deny who I am or what I am. But my color does not define me, and by conversing with someone on the basis of her race seems to presume that. I am more than my color (contrary to what my blog name and moniker imply). I like swimming. I'm sarcastic. I like red Skittles. I bite my nails. And oh yeah, I'm yellow.