The plight of the beautiful wife

A woman asked a random class of businessmen in Tokyo what the ideal traits of a girlfriend were. Beauty was at the top of the list, followed by intelligence and sense of humor. When asked to identify the ideal traits of a wife, the same men responded “healthy body,” “good child-bearer,” “good with children,” and “good at housekeeping.” Beauty, intelligence, and sense of humor were at the bottom. One businessman explained: “If you had a beautiful, sexy wife, you’d be in trouble. You’d be chasing off other men all the time.” The lyrics of that song inevitably came to mind: “If you wanna be happy for the rest of your life, Never make a pretty woman your wife.”

Strange, I assumed that all men everywhere wanted to marry the most beautiful woman they could “get,” with each culture having its own idea of beauty. A male friend bluntly informed me that he would have to marry a beautiful woman because he was “butt ugly” and needed the beauty genes to counteract his butt ugly genes so his children would be remotely presentable. (Strangest argument I heard in favor of marrying a hot chick.) Another male friend informed me that he wanted to be with a woman who was slightly more attractive than he was, but not too much more attractive.

I suppose certain men have some kind of insecurity — that they won’t be “enough” to keep their wife happy, that any woman, given the ample opportunity, will cheat on her husband. If a married woman is hit on 100 times a day every day, then at some point, her marital fidelity will buckle.

Perhaps I am a naïve romantic, but I’d like to think a woman who marries a man does so for love, and if she loves a man and marries him accordingly, then she won’t even think about cheating on him. A billion guys could pursue her, but all of them fail on the account that they are not the one man she loves: her husband.

(Source of quote: “Women of the Pleasure Quarters,” by Lesley Downer.)